Hani Cheng is a transformational coach. What does that mean? She helps people embrace change in all forms. I love the holistic approach she takes — incorporating meditation, mindset, and (to use her words) magic into her process.
It was a blast to connect with Hani. We got to go places in our conversation that I don’t often go with guests, digging into ideas around intuition, the inner voice, and how to live more truthfully.
You’re in for a treat.
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In this episode you’ll learn:
- What Hani does
- How did she get into with this work
- What is “Multidimensional Level Transitioning”
- How to make transitions successfully
- Why you need to step out of your comfort zone
- The different manifestation of your inner voice
- How to hear your inner voice
- How Hani dealt with transitions when bad things happened
- The importance of understanding the transformational process
- What she means by “the frequency of the future is not what your past is”
- How to thrive in any transition
You Only Live Once Life & Business Style by Ying Han Cheng
Software Generated Transcription:
Hani, thank you so much for joining me. Welcome to the podcast.
It’s a pleasure to be here. Thanks for training and guys, I love it. So the question I like to begin with is how do you begin to talk about what you do?
There are so many words for this, but to put it in a nutshell, I am basically a transformational guide that helps people thrive during transitions and have a very magical component of how I look at transitions, wealth ll, career life transformation from a multidimensional level.
I love it. There’s a lot of big words in there. Multidimensional, magical. Can you unpack a little bit more like what does that look like in practice and maybe even give us a maybe even a story format or an example of some of the transitions that you’ve helped people through?
Oh, yeah, for sure. So I guess from the top, right. Something that’s super relatable is transitioning your life right. And life, meaning career transitions, life transitions actually wrote a book called You Only Live Once Life and Business Innovation Style, coming out of this innovation perspective on how to apply innovation to figuring out like what your skill set, your talent is, what kind of business model fits that, what lights you up, and how do you actually create value in a way that the world is willing to exchange value with you.
And so that’s one of the ways that we help people kind of live into their potential, but also in a way that’s very grounded and practical. And then during that road, after taking like thousands of clients through that process all over the world, I realize a lot of people had actually a big issue with creating abundance and prosperity while having fun and also breaking out of the paradigm of I have to work, I have to give up my time in order to exchange it for money.
And so along the line of that, that’s when I decided to look at, OK, how can we actually figure out like what? In addition to transitioning your life, do you need to be aware of this in order to make this transition successful internally as well as externally? We talk a lot about changing your identity, changing your perspectives, fixed in growth mindset stuff. So we talk a lot about mindset, but we also talk about energy. And energy is something that, as you’re expanding into your potential, needs to be changed as well.
So, for example, like one of the clients who came to me as a corporate was in one of the big four corporate consulting firms to work 16, 18 hour days, sometimes almost burning out. Clients were very demanding of her and she was literally just squeezed to the max. And she came to me and she was like, know, I saw your poster somewhere in the subway station. I was this poster kid for my innovation program.
And then she’s like, I know you are so many feet large. And they found you on YouTube and it and I really wanted to know what you’re all about. And I’m like sitting there in Paris, this person who saw me on a poster in Singapore, and I reached out to me and we had a conversation and she basically asked, you know, like, how do you actually find your passion? And very quickly, we found out that her passion was actually in education and the only time she felt lit up was when she was doing meditation classes over the weekend as a community service for this Buddhist type organization.
And so her working with me was really to help her figure out, OK, how am I going to break through all of these issues I’m having at work in order to be more effective and productive? I love my job more or transition to a job without taking like a 10 X pay cut or like a negative 10 X pay cut and just be broke. And so during the process, we went through the entire process, which is in the book, and figuring out what really lit her up and then went through each of those barriers.
You know, a lot of like really getting her out of your comfort zone and step by step, like going through that internal, external, internal, external transformation until she literally attract if you were to use a law of attraction type word, a job that she dreamed about during our meditation. I use meditation activations a lot in our sessions to access intuition versus just. Only cognitive bulldozing and she was like, you know, I was talking to the CEO of this company, by the way, the stock didn’t even exist because we encourage her to reach out to people to create her own job description and pitch herself.
And she was like and I was asking him, like, what her vision was of this company, of this education technology company that was like really well funded. So there was actually cash flow. And to be able to hire someone at a higher level, senior level and just like and the way that he described his vision and what he told me about his vision was exactly what I shared with you that I saw in my meditation.
That was pretty crazy. That was when I was like, holy moly. Like, you guys are tapping into that same vision and you found someone who is a perfect match to execute and to contribute and impact people in the way that you want to. And that’s what I call synchronistic. Well, which is one of the summits that I run as well. Like synchronicity. Yeah. So that’s where the magic is.
I love it.
It is magical.
Yeah. Within six months she was on her way, even got engaged and married. Yeah.
What a massive, massive transformation. How did you get into this. Like where did you start and how do you always envision yourself doing this kind of work.
Oh my gosh, no I did not. OK, so I graduated like economics, environment, politics. Right, because I was one of those. Don’t know what I wanted to major in person and just wanted to do everything. And then, and then I was too chicken to start my own business. I decided to just work for corporate and do a master’s in innovation and all that.
And then eventually I had this 15 year disease that I literally had to cure myself because none of the doctors knew what to do with me. And I was just like it was like my day job was, you know, being only marketing firm and serving clients and being, you know, sort of marketing badass in that group. And then at night I’d be doing this whole, like, health research thing, like, how am I going to discover how to cure my disease?
And so long story short, had to figure out all kinds of modality is obviously Western Eastern medicine, like look through it all, nutrition and psychology and OP like then I started going into consciousness, expanding stuff, which is where all this energy work started coming through. Did the whole shamanic thing, went on trips to do. I do plan medicines like just really just opened up my entire potential to be like, OK, this work. Did this work?
No, I did this work and this whole thing was under secrecy because I was so ashamed of, like the fact that I had this thing and I was like, OK, not telling anyone about it until I figured this out. And then I literally was like sitting in this, like, meditation and going through this journey and feeling super nauseous. My brain and my mind and everything was like this crazy place. And I asked myself, am I ready to let this disease go?
And I literally felt totally stripped naked because I just couldn’t imagine myself at that age not being able to live and contribute to my full potential. Like if I’m getting this far in my career and I’m old and I have this disease with me, like, what would it be like if I had all the energy in my life? What would it be like if I actually could be over this, you know? And so, you know, I was like sitting there and I’m like that.
I have tried everything. Like, this is really my last shot. Like, what am I ready to let this disease go? And then deep within me before I could even finish that sentence, a voice came through me. I wasn’t controlling it. And it said yes. And yeah, in that moment, I just knew with every fiber of my being that not only was the disease never going to come back again. And I had to. Take control of my life, I had to be sovereign and I had to do what I really wanted to do and that was the message and it said, don’t worry, it didn’t say, don’t worry, I’ll take care of you like I wish.
But it was basically like, you know, if you can either choose to figure this out or, you know, or you’re going to go down this health thing that you’re going to constantly have to fight, you know. And so that’s when I realized how important it was for people to actually go for their purpose and go for their calling, because resisting it could cause physical resistance in many cases.
Yeah, do you feel like that disease was at least in part, prompted by your resisting your purpose or your calling in some way?
I definitely believe so, and actually I’m journaling right now. And I found one of my notebooks that I wrote in 2010 and I had written about how much I had enjoyed being an entrepreneur. Scene in San Francisco in 2008, and I knew all along that I had something to give that was in relation to transformation, but I was in marketing, right, selling servers. And so there was a far stretch. And so I always knew that I needed something more meaningful.
What’s this podcast called? And then I just knew that I was too chicken to do it, you know. And so, yeah. And I didn’t have a business model and I didn’t have this and didn’t have that. And I had like all these things and like, oh, you know, 99 percent of businesses fail and I get all these years. And I was like, OK, so then obviously those fears were louder than my calling.
And so. Yeah, so that won at that time. Yeah. And it was only when it was so loud.
Well I think what you’re saying is exactly right, only when it’s so loud that you can’t ignore it anymore. And I think that’s so often the motivator, the impetus that the spark that really pushes us over the edge into these transformational spaces or into a transformational journey, there’s often this inciting incident or painful incident. In your case, it sounds like it was at least manifested itself in your disease, in other people’s stories, it’s divorce or, you know, just depression or anxiety or whatever it is.
But it often takes like
heartbreak or death, sort of like, yeah, there’s always a thing there. And also it doesn’t have to be that way. It’s just to throw that in there because..
I love that.
Right now. What I’m doing a lot is I’m actually evolving proactively and it does take a lot of guts because why would you change your identity? We’re like, why would you expand your identity? Why would you step out of a comfort zone if it’s not comfortable?
And so there’s that element, too. And that’s when we get into this realm of play and magic and like, OK, like what else can what else is possible with this, you know? Well, you know what? What else can we do if we change the way we look at the monetary system and like if we change the way we look at our relationship to the system and if we break free from that, like what else is possible?
And like when you’re starting to go into those realms, then it’s like, OK, like once that thing kicks you into, kicks your butt and you’re motivated by pain, then you can also, you know, if you decide to be motivated by pleasure or motivate by curiosity, that’s a choice as well.
I love that. Yeah. What a great invitation, I think, for people to think about what is the motivation and what’s pushing them forward, you know, for people listening, what’s pushing you forward into listening into conversations like this? Is it pain? Is it curiosity? Is it playing? And if it’s more on the negative side, other ways that you can bring more of the positive into whatever transition, transformation, change you’re thinking about in your life, which I think is just a really beautiful invitation.
I’m curious. So you talk about that meditation and that you heard this voice in the answer to that question of are you ready to let go of the disease? And a voice said yes. Who was that voice? How do you think about that?
It’s a good question. All right. So this is going to sound a little bit out there, but stay with me. I’m with you on this call. You are probably here because you want to hear this and your inner voice is probably wanting you to hear this. And that is that I don’t know if you like someone who only believes in material things like human beings, like your flesh and your bones. But there’s definitely from what I’ve seen and what I’ve experienced with people and just like kind of every single person has something that most people would either refer to as soul, spirit or wisdom in or knowing, guidance, intuition, gut feeling like these are all, I would say, in the same range of experiences.
And that’s what I would call this voice. You do not live in just this body, in this third dimensional world, only thinking cognitive thoughts. That is logical, right? There’s like a part of you, my brain, that’s like nonlinear, that has a creativity that when you’re in the state of flow, it comes out and sometimes, like, you blow things out before you know it. And it’s like there’s this part of you that when you are fully relaxed, actually is your true essence.
I call it the true essence, but it’s really the part of you that you are most you stripping away all constraints, stripping away all the interferences and the noise of society and what you should do when you shouldn’t, when the limitations, like when you strip all that away, there’s this like one verb. This pure version of you, that is just truth, right, and you tapped into that and so I would call that inner person that you have as you’re listening to this, like the part of you that lives most often in your heart, you know, sometimes you touch your heart.
When you feel it, you feel it. When you look into the person that you love, you feel it when a song moves you. You feel it when you know, you think of your parents and they say something and you almost want to cry because you just feel so much affection and just so close and so intimate. It’s an intimate feeling and it’s a vulnerable place, but it’s also very, very safe and it’s like knowing.
So that’s how I would describe that being.
I love that. Yeah. And so the follow up question to that is, how can you and maybe, you know, maybe from your experience, another way to frame this is how do you but also asking because I think you have a lot to say about this. How can you generalize you? How can all of us hear that voice more?
There are so many ways and I’m so glad you asked, so I love doing all kinds of work in order to get to that part of us. Right. Because that part of us literally has the truth. So let’s say you were to be like, hmm, this job in front of me truth. What’s the percentage alignment of the job to my higher purpose and my highest being? Right. If you’re able to really tap into that voice, you might be even like this is advanced.
Right? So please don’t expect this and don’t, like, hit yourself on the head if you don’t get this, like, please protect yourself and your ego from this, but you might get a percentage. And like a lot of the programs that we train people to get close to so that we can actually hear that. So it’s like you could get like a sixty percent or maybe a forty percent rate. And it’s something that you can really once you get that relationship strengthened, you will actually be able to hear that.
Sometimes it’s like don’t turn right or don’t talk to the stranger or those kind of intuitive, how can you reach it? I’ll give you a couple of ideas. And I think I did a YouTube video on this like five different voices of your inner wisdom. It’s in Chinese, so you guys will probably not understand it. Maybe there’s a reason, but I’ll talk to you in English. The first one is writing journals. You can literally have a journal, but written journals to yourself like a play.
So you say your name Dot Dot and then you have your inner guidance. Whatever you want to call them could be like your name as well or, you know, a future version of yourself, whatever. You can have a dialog with them and you literally just like stream of consciousness. Hey, are you there? Yes, I’m here. Cool. Is there anything I can help you with? Can you help me with something about this topic? OK, and then you can go on and the conversation can happen.
I love that.
Yeah, that’s a really, really good one. And you can engage all parts of you if you want to talk to fear, for example. Anyway, that’s a different story. But just intuition, intuition. You can talk to them like that. Another way is meditation. So I have so many meditations online. I take people through shamanic journeys and all that kind of stuff. And then you go you get into that space like if you don’t have fear and you don’t have anything that is limiting you, then you can access that voice clear.
Because the biggest challenge is usually people will trust it and be like this for real. Like, is this like fake sound? Did I just make this shit up like, you know, so. So that’s the real thing that comes in the way. And also, you know, once you get into it a little deeper, your intuition, there might be kind of like false intuition, like ego disguised as intuition because it’s trying to trick you into believing what its agenda is.
And so that’s another story. But the truth is, you have that access to it. And the more you practice accessing it, the easier it is. So the easiest way to do that is actually yes, no questions. There are muscle testing things that some people do. Yes, no questions that you can access that inner wisdom. You can ask yourself, like, is this the right direction for me to go? And yes or no, should I eat this apple?
Yes or no, know something easy, but other ways of knowing can we do? Sometimes I help people channel that through them. So if you get a really quiet space and you just invite the inner voice to talk, speak through you, and this is usually more effective when you have a guide that guides you through it because you want to really step out of your thinking brain and go and use your knowing and being space. And when there’s a facilitator to help you do that, then it’s easier.
And then when that thing is speaking through you and it’s possible to do that and you record the session, you can go back and listen to it because sometimes you don’t remember it and you can have a list of questions and you can talk to your inner self like that.
I love it. Yeah, I love it.
It’s a great list of options. I hope that everyone listening rewinds the last few minutes, I think, and try some of these things. I think that there’s so much potential for us to live more with more. Yeah. More intuitively, more in touch with ourselves, more truthful and more truthful existence, which I think is a really beautiful invitation. I think also, like you said, to start easy, go easy on yourself if you’re just, you know, becoming acquainted with the inner parts of yourself.
But it takes time to be able to quiet your active thinking brain and be able to really hear. And so just like you said, the more you practice, the easier it becomes, which I think is really, really important. It’s hard to rewind to. So. From that meditation, when you’re in that space with your fighting the disease, and then you have this moment of clarity, of like, that you’re ready to let it go and that you want to move towards helping people in transformational journeys.
I wanted to kind of connect the dots of, like, really practically even financially like what all the steps look like for you to go from, OK, I’m doing this and, you know, just quit your job the next day. Did you like where that path took you between there and now?
Yeah, that’s a really good question and thanks for asking that. Yeah. So basically I came back from I was in Spain at that time in the city of Valencia, and then came back from there and then decided to not continue the role that I was doing or at least continue in the company. And so I had some savings and I gave myself six months and straight after quitting. Let’s see, yeah, straight after that rule then basically I started becoming.
What I would call digital nomad, but I still have a still paying rent, so it was like I had a base but I was traveling all over and financially saving’s was what got me through. I gave myself a deadline, which is six months. And then I decided I was going to check back in to see what I was going to be able to do if I wanted to continue on this journey. And of course, six months passed. And then I was just like, well, this isn’t really giving me the financial stability that I had when I was making when I was getting paychecks.
So then I started studying with different business coaches, different business programs and how to run. I mean, I had, like, done a lot of the academic business stuff. But to run your own business is very different from studying case studies off of Harvard Business School.
Yes. Especially on a different skill. Right. You’re looking at massive corporations and then it’s like, OK, and here it’s me and my laptop. How do we make money with this tool?
Like in Accounting?
Like, you know, how are we going to do, like, you know, like sales like that are selling you, you know, things like that. Yeah. So then I went through a phase of receiving mentorship, more importantly, receiving transformation, because I didn’t believe in myself that I could actually do this in a way that was fun. Right. OK, your question was how did it practically happen? So practically, there was a lot of stuff that I had taken.
But what I found that was most useful was actually the internal identity transformations that I had that took me there. So practically, I led the marketing, I learned the sales, I learned the business tools in order to implement it and the digital marketing that was important to collect leads and, you know, all that stuff, like I made four hundred and fifty YouTube videos and more and produce like hundreds of meditation’s of which, you know, a bunch of them are online on Inside Timer and wrote two books.
And we actually have tons of summits, tons of like all those things to get my word out. I did a world tour of the book and I did like, you know, I lived in like five different six different countries and did like meditations and ran classes, collaborated with a ton of different people and produced a lot of programs. Right. Unique with momentum. You only live one synchronistic. Well, like all liberated leadership programs did a lot of corporate events like those are all like products, offers, you know, just put a lot of stuff out there.
And that I mean, if you were to be like, OK, like, what was the thing that moved the needle forward? It was yeah. That was it was a momentum. It was the persistence of it. But most of it was internal. And like the shifts, you know, that it’s just this undying belief and commitment to figuring it out and to change every step of the way and evolve and accept the bigger. You kno w, I see it as like a baton that comes with a fire and you’re just like, OK, it’s time to be bigger.
It’s time to step out of my comfort zone again. OK, I will do it, you know, like that type of feeling.
Yes. I mean, it just resonates so deeply with me because I feel like. Well, just because you’re always having to change as an entrepreneur, you know, from my own experience and going down this path of like you’re around every turn, you don’t know what’s going to come. But what it’s proved to be true is that what’s going to have to become is me, right? Like, I’m going to have to change to take myself, but also my projects to where they need to go and to do things that I never thought before that I could do, let alone know how to do.
So it just sounds so familiar and so good to hear you putting words to that journey. It’s such a challenging journey.
It’s really, truly mastering change. And, you know, you got it. I mean, whenever you think, you know, you got it. And another thing comes into your face like, oh, now I’m being called to play a big game. I mean, I can definitely share a story about that if you guys are interested.
Yeah, I’d love to hear it.
Yeah. So we just did our synchronistic wall summit and had like fifteen elaborated leaders come on board who are creating businesses that they love and then also having the time and the fun and like, you know, the energy for the kids and like having more time to do it. And they’re not like those kinds that are just like fake gurus or because I have to talk to them and I meet them and work with them and the. I decided I was going to share my mentor list with people, but the thing was, even with all of that cool success and just like cool people and cool events that we were doing, I had this moment that really took me out again with all the tools, right.
With all the tools that I was teaching. And everything was cool like we’re on a roll and we are on this trajectory for five years. I’m so happy. And then one day I received this email and my inbox and I hadn’t heard from my right hand woman, which I’ve been working with closely for like 80 percent of the days for like the last two years. She was on a five year journey. We’re going to groom her. She’s going to run teams under us.
And I’ve been giving her everything I knew plus more and just really changing her, just putting everything in. She was so trustworthy. I loved her so much. We had an emotional connection too. Anyway, I got this email and she says, you know what? Blah, blah, blah, like lots and lots of details. And she’s like, you know, health isn’t having an issue. Unfortunately, I am going to have to resign officially.
This is my resignation letter out of left field. Did not know it was coming. We have so many plans in the pipeline and she just ghosted me and I sat there and I felt heartbroken. First of all, I was so worried about her because I hadn’t heard back from her. I wanted to send people to her house to see if she was OK. It was like a covid thing or it was like what was going on. And then because I cared about her so much, we had gotten her computer.
You know, we had gotten her all the stuff. I was like I was like this was the last thing that I thought would even occur. I was heartbroken. I felt immensely sad. I really hope she was OK. And, you know, and I texted her and I was just like, really? I wrote back to her like this, like, you know, how much I appreciated her and loved her. And just like all the things that I wanted to make sure she knew that I felt about her.
And thank you so much for everything that we’ve built together and all that. And I don’t hear back from her. And it was kind of silent. There was nothing back. And then a few weeks later, you know, this is the time where I’m just like, OK, we have to do something about the business because everything is at a standstill and there was no handover, no notice, period, nothing. And I’m sitting there and I’m like, OK, so I spent one day feeling, so this is like the yummy transformation process.
But basically, I’ll tell you what happened. And then it looks like the process actually really helped me propel things to another level anyway. So I spent one day crying everything out. I literally have felt a lot of emotion. And one of the things we teach is like we don’t want to suppress these emotions because they actually need to come through. And so I felt all these emotions. I had everything. I had a dance practice in the evening because I love Brazilian music.
And so I met my partner and I was like, this thing just happened. I don’t know if I can show up, but like, let’s just sit out. And I literally felt like the heart was like, oh, like, you know, every movement I made was just like, whoa, this just feels like, you know, it’s cathartic. But at the same time, I just felt even more sad because of the presence that you got to have when your dancing partner dance and you just still present with all the emotions and then going through grief, mourning.
The next day I woke up, you know, after applying the tools of the framework and. Something shifted and I was like, this is like it happened on a Tuesday. I got the message on Monday, Tuesday was Dan’s and then went and Tuesday, what got the message on Monday at 11 pm, couldn’t sleep the whole night, woke up on Tuesday, felt crap, and then spent the whole day mourning plus dancing at night. And then on Wednesday I felt something shift after applying the tools of doing that stuff and then a test.
I’m doing motorcycle right now. So I failed it like five times for this particular class. And so I passed it. And then we had two corporate clients sign up and then all the stuff started moving. And I was like, we were back and flow. And I was like, what the heck? I was like, this really works like, you know, applying the tools that we’ve used. And not only that, but like I’m just like, what?
So this was meant to be. And I started noticing that, you know, and then the next day, one of my mentors, I don’t know, just like a super big name and like he was just like calls me out on the call with, like, all these other people. He was like, honey, you’re waking up at 6:00 a.m. or five a.m. to attend this call. You know what, dude? Would anyone mind if we shifted the whole hall for the whole mastermind one hour later just for her?
Well, he didn’t say those words, but, you know, he was just like, would anyone mind if we shifted that call one hour later? And the people like, oh, no, no, not at all. And just like what? Like, why would he do that for me? And the whole everyone know? And I was like, wow, this is really weird. And, you know, I shared with him what had happened the next the following call.
So he didn’t even know this was happening in my life. And then I realized that for her role, we could split it up into five roles and then and and that would reduce the risk and it would be even more fun, because then I would have really experts in each of the things that she was doing. And I started really restructuring my business and serve my clients in a different way and. And, you know, just took the baton of, like, not seeing it as a setback.
Oh, I forgot to mention. And then I found out that she had started she had block me on Facebook. And I thought that was weird. And I kind of like I was just worried about her, you know, it’s like a shock because like she said, she has some health stuff and was like, OK. And I found out that she had started her own agency and had written and, you know, just taken everything we’ve taught her and gone ahead.
And there was some stuff. Yeah. And so, you know, on top of that, there was that, too. And yeah. So it was weird. And at the same time it was in full flow again for us. And so it was the weirdest thing. But I wanted to share the story with you because sometimes when shit hits the fan and you’re taken out from life like a big impact, if we just had the support system are just understood the transformational process and the change process, you’re able to rise and you can thrive during transitions.
There is no reason why you can’t get in back and flow, but not where you started, but into a better place. And, you know, now, like this flow is bringing me new friendships. Like my whole schedule shifted. I had triple the amount of work to do and we got all of that stuff done. Or our whole team had like triple the amount of work to do because to cover her and plus all the stuff she didn’t hand over and we were more productive in the last two or three weeks than we were for the last two months.
You know, and it’s crazy when you allow yourself and your mind to look at what is possible. Heal. The important keyword here is healing is actually valuable, like creating value for your business at that time or for your life at the time. Transition is happening like, you know, a huge part of it is transforming you. I had to say yes to step up and also say yes to a lot of new things that I was not comfortable doing, but then decided I like healing.
Was one of them in such a deep and vulnerable manner. And then another thing was to then say yes to restructuring the whole business right. And then executing that and then following through. And yeah. So I just want to share that with you. I thought about it.
I love it. Yeah.
So much of that. But like you said, that if you understand the transformational process, you can use it to rise to a new level, to a new place, almost like a springboard, a trampoline. Right. You feel like you’re falling down, but if you understand what’s happening, you can use it to rise up even higher. And that that’s I think, again, just a really, really important and beautiful invitation that in the midst of transition, that can be so scary.
There can be so much anxiety and or fear or just just all the uncertainty can can show up in so many different feelings. But to know that if you embrace that transformation that’s happening and embrace where it’s taking you, that you can use it to go places that you couldn’t have gone otherwise, which is really, really important.
And as you’re listening to this as well, like notice like how much resistance, what percentage of you is resisting the change that’s happening in your life right now and what percentage is actually courageously aware. So courageously aware doesn’t mean embrace or like you don’t have to be. Not to say that embracing is wrong, but sometimes if we were scared or just not comfortable, embracing might seem like a stretch. But it will get there at some point. But courageously aware means something like being observant and slightly detached.
So you’re not attached to the outcome. You’re not so committed and so married to the past that you’re unable to to heal or to move forward and also moving forward without healing the wounds of whatever it ripped away from is also ineffective. Yeah. So I really want to invite you as you’re listening, right. To allow yourself to notice, like what’s happening and just notice, you know, just notice it with an open heart and then invite yourself not to resist less because we’re still focused on resistance, but to invite your attention to see what other parts of your life is opening up.
I love that you used the word I think you said something about being married to the past, which I think is a really important part of the process, that so much of that resistance comes from our attachment to the way things are and if we can. Let go of some of that and choose to believe that the way things could be, that the way things could be, maybe even better than the way things are or the way things have been done, can really, I think, change our our mindset and the way that we’ve experienced that transformation process.
It’s like there’s so much I can say about this. Right. First thing is, like Einstein said, that the frequency of the solution or the answer is I’m paraphrasing, is not where the frequency of the problem lies. So the frequency of the future, if you were to kind of extrapolate that thought, the frequency of the future is not what your past is. And so in order for, let’s say, like I had to add, someone who comes came to me and she’d been struggling with this amazing human being, just struggling with, you know, also a condition.
And it had really stopped her from believing in herself to go for her dreams, which is, you know, really being a producer of of a major, major production, talking about topics such as like really taboo topics such as polyamory and connection and sensuality in a way that she felt was like documenting and just sharing different perspective on this topic in Asia, which is culturally also very taboo to talk about this. And she literally, for her, like the hardest thing for her to forget about her past, her to move through it was the part that she didn’t feel worthy and deserving of for.
She graduated from Harvard. It’s just super talented woman. But and just to sing like in all her friends were just saying, there’s only one rock star, you can’t be the rock star. And in order to really make it in the movie business or the film business, you got to be the one. Right. And that thought really took her down like it prevent her to even start. Right. So sometimes, like, as your and then eventually we work through it like really got her to connect with like her calling and then activated her from a perspective of energy.
And then things started happening in her life, like there was this person who like reached out to her and she pitched the idea and he said, you know what, maybe it’s a podcast. It could be a TV show. It’s like a major TV network in Singapore. And then she was talking to another person and like, you know, things sort of unfolding. And then she just texted me like voice message me a few days ago and was like, oh, my gosh, like a roll came up and is exactly what I’ve been wanting.
And when I first started working with you, like Sedin even couldn’t even see it, couldn’t imagine it, couldn’t see it like and there was so, so, so much resistance. She probably had one of the like the resistance was high. And so I tell you guys this story because the higher you assistances and the more possible you think that thing is that you really, really want the cooler. The other end of it is and the more I would say, the more this thing is just going to blow your mind.
You know, if it were that easy, you would have been there already.
Yeah. Oh, that’s so good. Yeah. If it were easy you wouldn’t be listening to this conversation, right? If it were easy, you’d already be there and.
You would be doing it. You would be like living in it.
And changing your lifestyle is just like changing income bracket. Right. It’s really, really hard to believe and hard to imagine. How are you going to go, let’s say if your socioeconomic status is like in one place and you’re like, I kind of want to change into like two or three levels of thought and I want to jump there, like, it’s hard for you to imagine that if you cannot and have not had that experience in that perspective.
So when you’re making a decision to jump out of this transition or into this new career, it’s not going to be comfortable, you know, and it’s not going to look exactly the way that you want it to look or even the way that you can perceive now. And that’s not the point. The point is that, eh, that thing is in alignment. What you’re wanting, what you’re going for is in alignment to who you are, takes advantage of your skill set, takes advantage of everything that you have had success with and still resonate with today and takes advantage of your lifestyle or rather take some consideration of what kind of lifestyle you want to live and also the monetary, you know, whatever that is that’s important to you and all the meaningful things and the values.
Right. Takes consideration of your holistic life, not just your career, but your whole career plus life. This is kind of how I see it. And then if that is true for you, then the only thing that’s stopping you from getting there is your belief system and the resourcefulness. And you know, and your resilience. Yes, and the plan.
Yes, well, it feels like it circles back of like and then we have to deal with how do we change that belief system? Because it’s like there’s a part of us that we see the vision, we see where we want to go. And yet we know that there’s something about our beliefs that need to shift. What are your thoughts about how do we go about making that shift?
Oh, I love you asking this question. So I like it because, like, I literally just wrote this thing for my copyrighter. He was like, write this thing that you want to share. And I wrote it and then it from like two pages. It turned to 30. And it’s like a mini book right now. And it’s how to thrive in any transition. And it includes in one of the first one is like figure out what you really, really want.
Right. So goes through my whole story and interest and it will really connect with the source and the voice within the second step is breakthrough. Anything that’s stopping me, which is the belief system stuff. So belief system change, I’ll tell you that section here. And it goes into like all the multiple dimensions, there’s like four. But today we’ll talk about this belief system. Change is like the zero point one version, which is understand, first of all, like what is your belief system that you have?
Like if you’re feeling resistance to something, like understand that you’re not like the resistance is there because you’re not seeing the possibility of it and you don’t believe in the possibility, you’re believing in the limitation and you’re believing that it’s impossible. Right. So instead of getting stuck there and just running into that wall and then turning back and be like, well, then that means my present moment is more viable and credible than this idea. The invitation is to.
Well, then what is possible? Right. And so the way to shift it is write down a list out like what are your actual beliefs? You know, maybe it’s impossible to be on H like if I were to use the previous example of one of my clients, then it’s like, OK, maybe it is impossible to be on like HBO and pitch a story and have it both go through like tomorrow. Right, OK, but what is possible.
What becomes possible if I were to believe in myself, to carry out my calling, like what is possible is a great question to ask to shift that, ask questions right now. If this is the belief system of, let’s say in order to make money online, I have to create an opt in and then have to write emails and I have to do a consistent content and read it and have to burn out or and that’s really, really tiring.
Like if that’s your belief system, then it’s like, OK, well then I like to I like to ask the question of what’s a really fun way to get to the outcome or what if it were possible to do it a lot simpler or what if no. What would it look like if I were to just do one hour of work and get the same outcome? Right. So it’s the quality of the questions you ask yourself and also the ID and not getting attached to your belief system because your belief systems are simply a belief, right?
It’s easily changeable. And if it limits you, then it’s not working for you. If it makes you feel heavy, if it makes you feel discouraged, if it makes you if it’s yours, you away from your calling or your dream or the lifestyle that you want and the way you want to live, then it is clearly not serving you. And so if you choose to believe that, then you’re choosing, which you have 100 percent choice then to stay in that paradigm.
Yeah, that is so good. I love it. I love it so much. If I know you mentioned that you have this PDF. I know that we talked about this before we hit the record button. People want to follow along more with you and give your walk of of all of this in the pdf that you created. Where can we find that?
You can find it at www.yum.yoloabundance.com/change. So it’s four actionable steps to thrive during transitions, even with uncertainty.
And we walk through the four different steps. I talk about all the beliefs that I had, what I subconsciously believed, and the one that took me through that first change. And then there’s also a bunch of different like workbook type column things that you can fill out to find your transition, limiting beliefs. And then there’s a bunch of actions you can take. And then and then at the end, it tells you how to. Kind of converge and synthesize and bring that down into something you can take action to today and how to stay accountable to that.
I love it, I love the emphasis on action and I feel like we’re wrapping up too soon because I feel like there’s so much more that I want to explore with you. But we’re up against our time, our time here. And so we’ll have to just stop there and know that there’s more for us to explore. And I can’t wait to myself, go through your work in more detail.
Thank you so much for joining me. And for everything that you shared here today, it’s just such a fun conversation.
Thank you for having me on. You guys are so lucky to have such a freaking amazing host. And yeah, I’m excited for everyone to continue this journey with you and. Yeah.
Thanks so much.
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