When I was young I would tell people that I wanted to be a rock star when I grew up. Most of the time they took it as a joke; and most of the time I delivered it as a joke. But a good joke is funny because it speaks some amount of truth. For me, the truth was that I wanted to be a rock star. I wanted the lights, the stage, the enthusiastic fans. I wanted all of that.
Your dreams matter. There was a time in my life when I didn’t know if I could believe that. It felt like the tension between my dreams/desires and the reality of my everyday life was so great that it would crush me. I felt stuck and the weight of the world was heavy on my shoulders. I’ve since come to know that we need places to voice our dreams. We need people to believe and hope on our behalf. And we need to be inspired by and invited into the dreams of others— to participate and to know that more is actually possible.
I believe in the power of dreaming.
(This post was written and published on 5/1/2014. Though I am older now, the sentiment expressed here is still very true.)
My calendar just popped up a notification:
Tomorrow is Dan Cumberland’s 32nd Birthday.
I have no idea how that happened. 32 is a big number. I’m not ready for it. But then again, I haven’t been ready for my birthday since I turned 18. I guess I have birthday sadness.
I feel sad. I feel sad that it’s been so long. I feel sad that life is still not what I want it to be.
I am never bored anymore. In any moment of down time, my device calls out to me to check in and see what’s happening on social media and email.
This is great from one standpoint: I don’t have to be bored anymore. And who likes being bored? Certainly not me.
It’s not great from another: what do we lose when we lose the ability to be bored? Even more disturbing: what happens when we no longer allow ourselves to feel the more difficult feelings?
I love every variation of this word. It makes me relax and open up. I think of open blue skies, wide fields, and room to run and play. It is also a word that describes the way work that matters should feel for you.